Q: "How can I prepare my son (or daughter) to take proper care of his/her living quarters when he/she goes on a mission (or attends college away from home)?” is a frequently asked question by mothers of prospective missionaries and college students.

Daryl: When I was serving with my husband, Hank, as he presided over the Netherlands Amsterdam Mission, we greatly appreciated and admired those missionaries who kept their living spaces clean and neat.  Some months into our service, I was invited by the editor of the Church News Section of the Deseret News to write an article about how the condition of a missionary’s apartment or flat affected his work.

In preparing my response, I discussed this question with both elders and sisters during the next round of zone conferences.  I presented questions to them in three categories. 

The first one had to do with their training at home.  I inquired, “How many of you know how to make your bed?”  A lively discussion followed as they assured me that of course they knew how to make a bed. Then I asked, “How many of you know how to make your bed everyday?”  There was stunned silence.  It became readily apparent that it wasn’t the knowing, but the doing that mattered. 

It was evident that what young people needed at home, prior to embarking on missions or leaving for college,  was not just being taught to do a task, but being taught to do the task every time it needed doing.  They needed to form the habit of doing the job.  Young adults who have developed good, strong habits at home have a decided advantage when they go out into the world.  Therefore, what mothers and fathers need to do at home in preparing their children for missions (and  life!)  is to instill good habits in them.

My second question was, “How many of you know how to care for a bathroom or how to keep your living space clean and neat?”  Some did, many did not; in fact, a lot of them were clueless as to how to clean a toilet or take care of a refrigerator, for example.  It’s easy to let a child get by with doing dishes, taking out the trash, or mowing the lawn, but it’s also important  that parents train children in every aspect of caring for and managing a home.   

The Missionary Training Center is programmed to reinforce good training from the home and help missionaries off to a good start in the field. The standards there for cleanliness and orderliness are high.  In fact, hospital corners are required in bed making.

The third topic for discussion was about how the condition of their living quarters affected the work. They were unanimous in admitting that disorder and neglect brought a spirit of contention and conflict, whereas orderliness and cleanliness  brought a spirit of love and peace into the home.  They agreed with the statement that “A clean, orderly house does not guarantee happiness, but happiness is almost impossible amidst dirt and confusion.”   Above all, orderliness and cleanliness are conducive to receiving the Spirit, and they needed the Spirit to be with them in order to be effective in their sacred service!  

  -- Daryl